Month: October 2011 (Page 4 of 5)

what’s yours is mine

We have a big birthday coming up. Not so much huge step up the hill, but it’s markedly different than H’s last birthday, as now he has a sister who possesses an awareness of toys and receiving gifts. Last year she was barely crawling. Yikes! How a year goes so quickly… 

So between the birthday and Christmas coming about, it made me do some thinking about how we approach ownership in our home. Up to this point, neither kids really “possess” anything of their own. H regularly rides M’s pink and purple tricycle (much to his father’s chagrin), since she can’t yet and she is clueless about it. All toys remain in their respective homes – the first to begin play gets the first round. If both show interest and a fight erupts, the second on the scene must wait their turn and find a different toy in the meantime. Honestly, even food and drink are experienced in this fashion. Milk cups and ham slices are to be passed around. (However, don’t think me more thoughtful than you ought; this approach was conceived mostly out of laziness.)
But soon and very soon H will unwrap a series of gifts to be “his.” I’m not sure what to think about this. I’m kinda digging our communal living approach. I’ll go so far as to say it’s biblical. In actuality, we own nothing – it’s been given to us as a blessing to steward and care for, and can be taken away just as easily. Now now, I hear you say in your head, “what I purchase with the money I earned is mine.” And while I’ll grant a little latitude, I’ll simply ask the source of your gifts and abilities that make work possible. What if you were gored by an ox or fell  in a deep fryer and the brain, arms, legs or mouth that you use to make a living is no longer at your disposal? I say, my friends, even the ability to work hard for a paycheck is a gift not to be overlooked. 
So I like that currently my children own nothing. In the house which they live there are boxes and shelves of toys which they are welcome to play with, but they must take care of them and return them to their rightful places at the end of the day. And these same toys will be played with by siblings alike. I’m hoping this approach places the idea of stewardship into more than just what numbers we put in a plate on Sunday. 
However. I have doubt. Oh, yes, there’s always doubt in this little brain, and this time I’m going to share it aloud. Will an ownership-free childhood deprive them of what it means to give? How does the concept of having something and choosing to give it away fit into the idea that it wasn’t theirs to begin with? Is it strengthened or weakened? And will they value something less if it’s not “theirs”? Will they take advantage of and be careless with the things that they feel no direct ownership of? 
And hear me clearly: we have too many grandparents in the mix for me to feel as if we’ll escape 18 years without hearing “It’s my _____!” Birthdays and Christmases are fast approaching where each will unwrap his/her own and then suddenly feel as if said toy needs to be protected  from siblings. (Which, I’m sure, will lead to comparison, and we’re sure to hear “it’s not fair! I want one of those”). 
But surely there has to be a way. There has to be. I know I’m not to the first to wrestle with this. I don’t want to mindlessly accept the current models of consumerism and materialism. However, as others (and we as parents) choose to bless my children, I want them to experience it to the nth degree. As someone who loves to give good gifts, I don’t want to deprive anyone of that right. It’s a good and joyful thing to have excited gift givers in your life. And I want them to experience those who are giving so that they see it modeled and become generous people. Getting rid of giving gifts is not a solution or a goal. 
A healthy understanding of ownership, or stewardship, is the aim. But, as in so many things: what does that look like? Especially on Christmas morning. 

in three words

I think you can change the world, one life at a time, with three words.

I love you.
Yeah, me too.
I don’t know.
Can I help?
I’m sorry, too.
Are you sure?
God loves you. 
What are the three words you need to hear today?

the bucks of star

I sat down this evening to watch a 20/20 anchoress grill the new CEO of GE on corporate responsibility, evading taxes and job creation. It was a fascinating interview, ending with the face of GE asking why Americans didn’t route for him/them as “Germany roots for Siemens and Japan roots for Toshiba.” He believes that if given a tax vacation, American companies would create jobs, even though a previous, similar experiment failed to produce those results.
Then, as I attempted to catch up on my bloggy news (all 172 unread posts), I came across Late Enough’s public service announcement: Someone Needs To Tell The American People: Corporations Don’t Care. I’m generally unfamiliar with this march on Wall Street (though I’ve seen some pictures and am beginning to connect the dots), and I don’t necessarily share all of her views, her post – complete with fantastic graphic – is worth a gander. It might not leave you with a warm, fuzzy feeling toward American corporations, so when you leave there, do a little google search on “Starbucks and stateside microeconomics”. Time reported that Starbucks is now putting out tip jars to invite customers to join with it in helping cure the American economy by an attempt at micro-economic loans for stateside small businesses.
All this caught my attention ever since I posted about my connection between parenting and politics. I said, and I quote (whoa… what is the protocol around self-quoting?): Change begins with you, my friend. I didn’t think much about it until my cousin quoted that line and shared it on facebook (see? I was actually quoting a quoter. Totally legit). I hadn’t intended on making some brilliant political insinuation, but upon reflection, I had. And I believe it more now than when I, albeit accidently, wrote it.
On the eve of a big – if you ask me, potentially game changing – election, I think We the People need to engage in some healthy self-reflection on the topic of change. What have we asked of our leaders? And how have we gone about being, as my smarter-than-me friend puts it, “part of the solution rather than part of the problem”?
We want jobs. We want economic relief. We want change. But what are we wiling to do – to change – to get there?  On a macro- and micro- level our country has asked our elected representatives to do something that we ourselves are not willing to live. We’re asking them to fill the pool without offering a foot of hose; in essence leaving them at the mercy of the rain gods. We’re too smart – too innovative – of a country to believe that’s where solutions come from.
My list of excuses centers around: but what can I do? I’m just one person. I can’t create a job. I can’t hire someone. I can barely afford to purchase locally grown food to support the farmer down the road, let alone offer a loan to a start-up business.
But I can put a dollar in the tip jar to partner with a huge corporation in an endeavor to make change. I can, as a shareholder in any publicly traded company, give some voice that perhaps bottom line isn’t the only consideration – if we want to see long term gains, the company should be investing in people. And, as previously mentioned, there’s power in the dollar. Until GE wants to jump in with us to try to make change in the landscape of American jobs, perhaps I’ll look elsewhere for my major household appliances. We can “buy American” all we want, but before patting ourselves on the back perhaps we should ask if that company is hiring Americans. In this vein, I could write a separate but similar post about why I buy Honda.
So here’s to stepping up to the plate. With much hope, these gains in the world of small businesses will set afire a new collaboration of local businesses, all investing in one another, to create a new economy.
Cheers.

« Older posts Newer posts »

© 2024 Michele Minehart

Theme by Anders NorenUp ↑