Year: 2008 (Page 3 of 8)

the chicken or the egg

or it’s equivalent theological question: free will vs. God’s predestination.

I have had similar conversations revolving about this topic a few times in the past couple weeks, which is curious because i feel like i rarely have opportunities to have these conversations anymore. but good ol’ patty b. started kindling a thought when we were talking about God and babies (2 of our current favorite topics at the moment). when you deal with topics like, people who don’t get to have the babies they wanted, or, people who get to have babies they didn’t want, God is certainly to show up in conversation, usually as the veiled bad guy (for the one who didn’t get what they want) in the phrase, “well, God knows what he’s doing…” now really. who’s going to argue with THAT statement? of course God knows what He’s doing! but i’m not sure it’s the appropriate response for the given situation.

so we were verbally processing through such statements and were talking about how when it comes to reproduction in general, somehow the auto-predestination switch gets turned on in people’s thought patterns. Patty’s a bright girl. She said, “you know, i really do think there are some free will options in the matter. there are ways for people to avoid getting pregnant.”
mind you, this is all background material for my general thought.

that’s when i told her of my opinion of the predestination vs. free will argument.

i am dramatically opposed to predestination, not because i believe it’s theologically incorrect, but because i’ve seen people live out such beliefs sooooo badly. if you’re going to comment about the sovereignty of God or some other great insight as to why we must believe that God predestines us, then please refrain (i’d like you to argue me on my other points, please). You’re probably right. I’ll just agree with you. bring out the “for those whom God predestined, he also called…” scripture.

the reason i come to butt heads with the predestination believers is not because of thought but because of practice. i have seen before that many a good meaning christian make decisions based on “God’s will” that really had nothing to do with God, but more of the good christian’s attempt to remove any responsibility from him or her because of the decision. God ordaining something, God making something happen is the mother of all trump cards. Call it the Right Bower (is that how bower is spelled in euchure?). no one wants to argue with what God wants, so a person really only needs to “feel peace” about a decision to decide that it’s what God had planned all the time and thus the right decisions and thus, if things go wrong/badly, it’s because God ordained that, too.

with this thought pattern, a person will never make bad decisions, they’ll just have to live through whatever God decides to insert into their lives.

now, i’m all for a God that just tosses things into our lives. He’s done it to me. it’s crazy. i believe God does things that are inexplicable. i believe he brings us blessings and he takes us down roads that are a little bumpy. because all these things are included in this journey of life. and i really believe that you should seek God’s wisdom when making decisions. you should feel a peace about decisions you make (not lack of fear, but peace). but we have to play the cards that are dealt to us. God does the dealing, that’s for sure. but i just can’t get there that he also plays the hand for us (can you tell that i should be at the lake? all these card playing analogies…).

so i’d like to be convinced. i’d like to see someone live this beautiful balance of keeping in step with God’s will and direction while realizing that as God’s child i have to learn to make decisions based upon the model set before me. but there may be times that matt, mark, luke or john didn’t record exactly what my example did, so i need make the best decision I can and trust that God is going to help me with whatever this decision brings into my life. he won’t “give me what i deserve” because of it, but maybe there’s some reaping and sowing involved.

so that’s my thought. it was broached again last night by lively conversation, which is why it’s still on the brain this early AM.

there are times that God provides for you and you didn’t even know you needed to ask him to do it. but then it comes, and you think, “how did i really think i was going to do this on my own? thanks, God, for knowing more than me.”

closing the door

somehow it seems very appropriate that we move on graduation weekend. this, the weekend before, is when i shall pack. if i can find enough boxes. but i’m sitting here looking around at all the stuff that now must somehow find its way to a new home in findlay.
i hate packing not only because it involves lifting heavy things and being forced to purge others (“what if i need that later?”), but because it also means saying goodbye. i remember the feeling of packing up at 1605 in University Commons and hated the entire thing… not only because the girls next door had a party and my parents were arriving the next day to load a truck, but because i was saying good bye to some very very wonderful elements in my life. i knew life would never be the same.
and it’s kinda that way now. to jj, this house was our first home, the “love shack”. to me, this was my first step into adulthood, the home to so many memories of wonderful times. it started with scraping wallpaper with mary and taping box patterns in my bedroom with scott. then there was “fun with ang and chad” night- complete with Pit and Anna and colored guitar. sitting on the couch with kristy, coming up with some of the best and worst ideas for youth events ever. i wish i had a dollar for every glass of wine we drank on that couch. then there was the crotcheting. and when K hung her hideous Kuenzli Tacky Craft wreath over my clock and wouldn’t take it down until may.
Then Clinton nearly broke a toe trying to get Kristy moved out. watching movies and making smores in our backyard. small groups coming over, taking up my entire street because of bad parking jobs. setting up stations so that kids could pray throughout my entire home. making christmas goodies with alyssa, rachel and jordan. kelsey or abbie coming over so we can run.
it’s crazy that it was a year ago when i said goodbye to being a church staffer. and now that i’m also leaving the place that was home to so much of that, i can see how important that space in my life really was to me. i knew it was important when i left the job, but now that i’m leaving the town, the home to it… well, i just miss it, that’s all.
i’m sure ryan can vouch for it, but really it’s harder on this side. kids loose one youth director (and get another). retired youth directors loose 50 kids (and there’s no such thing as replacements).
ok, i need to be done with the melodrama. time to wish another one of my wonderful memories a happy grown-up life at their graduation party. onward we go.

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