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more heretical musings

I noticed today that Eugene Peterson chose a specific phrase when describing how God will dwell among the Israelites (2 Chronicles 6:12-18). Perhaps the first clue that these theological wanderings aren’t completely developed is that I’m using a translation like The Message as my starting point. But he says, “Is it true God will move into the neighborhood?” 

This caught my eye because I recalled the same phrase being used in the New Testament when Peterson described Jesus’s arrival on earth. “The Word became flesh and blood, and moved into the neighborhood.” (John 1:14). 
I’ve heard the typical phrases of “God came down” or “God descended” or “God dwelt among them” before, but until Peterson put his hip, old-man spin on it, I never made a connection. If there is a connection. But let’s pretend that there is for a moment. You know, just to see what happens. 
So Solomon built a temple. It was his daddy’s deal, but since David had killed a few too many men in battle, he wasn’t allowed to see it’s completion (interesting, eh, the reasoning God had? What a Father-like thing to say. I hear it in the tone that I tell H he can’t play with stickers because he didn’t pick up yesterday). But Solomon takes the reigns, follows in his father’s faithful footsteps, takes years to procure all kinds of gold, silver, elaborate garments and such, and then has the temple built by the most skilled craftsmen around. They dedicate the Temple to God, and then God moves in and lives among them. God moves into the neighborhood. He’s there whenever you knock on the door. (I know you just started to sing the Three’s Company theme song*). 
Fast forward, and Jesus arrives on the scene. John says, in Peterson-speak, he moved into the neighborhood. Old fashioned Bible talk says that he dwelt among us. Same idea. 
So far, all very kosher with mainstream theology.  
So, Solomon offered a somewhat normal building – though special to him because of the meaning – and God lived inside, and it became something more than normal. Holy. I mean, God lived there, so it’s no longer a normal, albeit very, very, large building. It wasn’t Solomon’s intention but God’s presence that changed what it was. However, Solomon’s intention kinda got the wheels moving in that direction. Solomon participated in what God did when making the temple. But without God, not possible. The presence of God changed how the building was used. 
Then there’s Jesus. Oh, yesssss I am. 
A somewhat normal man, in the sense that physically he lacked go-go-gadget arms or a need for a telephone booth to change into SuperJesus and get his powers. No, a man (theologians emphasize this). But because God lived inside, he became something more than normal. Holy. It wasn’t Jesus’ intention, his efforts, but God’s presence that changed who he was. Jesus was part of the equation – he participated in what God was doing, what being a willing sacrifice to all. The presence of God changed how his life was used.  
I’m not trying to take away from Jesus’ holiness. His place is central to my thinking. But I don’t think Jesus’ rightful place as Savoir is the part where we sing a little soft. 
But if what made Jesus the Son of God was the presence of God in his life, then what about us? Recalling how the Spirit descended and came to live among us, what does that mean for us? There’s plenty of New Testament  language to support me here. I mean, saying that we are “temples of the Holy Spirit”, in light of Peterson’s phrase-ology**, takes on a whole new connection. We are also called “sons of God” through adoption. And because of God’s spirit in us, we will also rise from the dead. That’s mentioned more than once in the letters that floated around in the post-Jesus era. 
Sometimes I wonder if we look past the element that God did this thing with Jesus so He could show us what it means that God lives in us. We think, “well what does a life with God even look like?” and God said, “well, let me show you with my boy here.”  But somehow through the years we’ve come to think, well, but that’s Jesus. He also rose from the dead. (I’ve mentioned this line of thinking before). 
But guess what? In our line of theology, we will as well. If we want to be like him in death, why aren’t we  more like in him in life?  I’m curious how the lives of believers would be changed if we suddenly discovered that our measure of post-life was directly tied to our current life of faith and our participation in what God is doing. Forgive me if I sound a little Rob Bell-ish here (and yes, I am finally reading his newest book. It was on the shelf at the library when I needed a new book, quickly. God all but ordered me to read it, right?). But I think he draws a bit of a valid point that we should be like him more in our life than just in our death. 
Evangelical Christianity has a pretty high Christology, and that’s okay. He is central to our faith. But sometimes I think we view him like we did the popular girl in school and think, “but I could never be like that.” However, we fail to realize that what makes him who He is – the Spirit of God living and at work – is also available to us. (And I’m not even sure you could argue that we get a lower dose; Jesus said it only takes a mustard seed sized portion). We cop out and think that because we march in the band that we’re excused from living up to our full spiritual potential. We’re mere victims and drew the short straw when it came to spiritual prowess and therefore there’s no need to take adventurous steps of faith into the world of living in shalom, with [love, joy, peace, patience, goodness, faithfulness, self-control] because that takes effort and restraint and character and I’m just little ol’ me with nothing to offer***. But when it comes to rising from the dead, being eternally rewarded for believing the right things… well, yeah, I want in on that. 
Somehow I don’t think Jesus would be highly inclined to validate that line of thinking.  
So, at the heart of this all, I have to ask myself, How will I engage the Spirit of God that lives in me, today? How will I participate in what God is doing? How will I be more like Jesus in life rather just in death? 
And it’s barely 8am. This could be quite a day. 
*And what are the next 2 lines of that song? Everyone always reduces to mumble…
**Name that musical!
***And, now that I think of it, I think God was one step ahead of us in trying to prevent our excuses. In his infinite wisdom (quite literally), he chose someone from the sticks (“what good can come from Nazereth?”) and put him among the low men on the totum pole (shepherds, fishermen, tax collectors). But the human mind is a terrible thing to waste, so we come up with justifications for those things as well.

stuffed

While in the process of moving, Husband had the habit of going through the trash. Not because he kept loosing the keys to my dad’s truck (that happened after we moved), but because I kept throwing things out. I was in charge of packing and organizing and I used the opportunity to declutter a bit, mostly because I didn’t want to have to move the stuff. Our new house has far more storage than the old one (a woman definitely was involved in laying out the upstairs with all the closets!), but I still could find no reason to keep a lot of stuff. So we had a massive yard sale and didn’t even bring in the leftovers – they went directly to goodwill or the trash. 

I think most of my declutter inspiration came from a few of the blogs I’ve been following, which have an emphasis on simplicity. I was tired of owning crap and simply refused to move it. I’ve come to prefer a few nice things over a lot of crappy things. 
But this morning as I was reading, I found that while my motivation wasn’t spiritual, perhaps it should be. I read a prayer of David as they were beginning to garner things to build the temple (1 Chronicles 29:12-19). There’s some worthwhile talk of how we’re giving back what was God’s to begin with and how our lives are mere shadows. Good stuff, sure, but nestled in there was a shout out for his kid: “And give my son Solomon an uncluttered and focused heart so that he can obey what you command, live by your directions and counsel, and carry through with building The Temple for which I have provided.”
Give my child an uncluttered heart. 
I’ve been standing on the soapbox for a while now regarding the amount of noise in our kids’ lives, that we can’t hear God speak to our hearts because there’s so much background noise going on – we’re constantly entertained, being sold to, and having our attention be diverted by media and the like (cell phones, music, computers… I know these things divert my soul away from the important stuff). But I’ve never given a thought to how stuff impacts a kid in the spiritual sense. I think David was onto something. 
I’m not sure what this means for me. I’ve already decreased the number of toys out and about for the kids; I’ve left only about 1/3 of them in the toybox and the rest are in the basement to be rotated in and out later. They haven’t noticed. I’ve asked for fewer toys for their birthdays and holidays because, in all honesty, the toys aren’t for them, they’re for me. The kids find it more enjoyable to be doing whatever I’m doing – baking bread, sweeping the floor, gathering laundry (seriously! They love it! I consider it training). But when I want to escape my responsibilities into the world of facebook, blogging or (my most recent addiction) pinterest, I need something to fill their time and attention. “Get ____ from the toy box” I instruct. Sure, there’s a need for them to be able to self-direct in their play, but they’re generally doing that with their sippy cups from “their drawer” in the kitchen. Or the stones in the backyard that we’ve adopted as a sandbox of sorts. 
Until this morning, and even as I write, I didn’t know the full extent that I use stuff to escape. Escape my 
children, escape my responsibilities, escape what is really in my heart. Escape God and His calling. And this is what my children will grow up knowing as normal or good. 
And give my child an uncluttered and focused heart…. 
It seems that parenting isn’t just about providing opportunities via introduction and what you say, but it’s also clearing a path. Creating space, in the house and in the heart. For everyone. 

Rock > me < hard place

To say that I’ve been in denial about returning to work is an understatement. I avoided offering my availability, and when I did it took 3 times of sitting at the computer to submit it. I was supposed to visit a sitter 2 weeks ago and finally went today. My mom and I toss around things like going to Ikea in October, when I’m supposed to be back in full swing. 

I had fully anticipated that moving to a new area and knowing no one would encourage me to be excited about work again. After all, at least then I’d get to interact with grown ups. But the opposite is true. I love my job because I have excellent coworkers, and now I’m not a quick jaunt away from Emily’s candy bowl or a visit with Dan Who Knows Everything. I won’t run into the other Emily in the bathroom every hour, on the hour (but we’re both now un-pregnant, which will also change that dynamic). I won’t people-watch as others use the back aisle. I won’t hear Janet get all excited about the deer coming out to the salt that Don left for the “wildlife.” 
In short, I’m going to be doing work without the perks of going to work. And I don’t think this is fair. Yes, my whiny voice just came out to play. 
To some, this type of work is what they trained for; they’ve wanted to be in business or HR and so they took steps to get there. I simply wanted to retire my professional youth ministry hat for a while for a slower pace, so I fell into this position via a strong employee referral. I gradually added to my “skill set” and it turned out that I had a knack for talking to people on the phone and checking my email. Very few who know me are surprised. 
After today’s visit to the potential sitter, I want to dunk my head into the near-boiling crock pot of chili on my counter (and WHY does it near-boil on LOW? Sheesh). She was not what I want for my kids each day. Not that she doesn’t give effort; it’s just that we have very different guiding philosophies. But, as previously mentioned, the market of people dying to take on 3 kids under three is…well, slim pickins’. 
And then there’s the part of me that has really enjoyed this time with my kids. We’ve finally got a groove going and the whining has decreased and the happy direction toward play has increased (a significant development from a month ago). Not to mention there’s a list of places I’d love to visit, like library story time, the cloth diaper play dates, the museum, the zoo… all squeezed into our social calendar currently filled with EI appointments and evaluations. 
But to stay home is to come up with a new strategy for income. Or scraping several hundred dollars from the budget. Neither is appealing, let alone considering feasibility. And I’m not completely naive to know that our good days could stem from and undercurrent of me knowing it’s short-term. If I were faced with an open calendar of days at home with the kids, I’m not sure the attitude would be the same. 
I either need a rich Aunt Edna to suddenly decide to include me in a will or grow a marketable trait worth $50/hour that can be completed between the hours of 12-2 and 7-9pm. I’ll take wagers of which will happen first (hint: I don’t have a rich Aunt Edna. I don’t even have a poor Aunt Edna that could be concealing riches). But then I’ll need to start a recruitment strategy of people to be my friend so that I don’t indeed go crazy from being home all day. 
I guess once a recruiter, always a recruiter… 
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