Once every, oh, 2 months I begin to get a bit restless in my life situation. Some people rearrange furniture or paint a room or take up a new workout routine. I tend to daydream about projects that generally involve people around me and large amounts of capital. Exhibit A: so far this weekend, I’ve wanted to start a school and plant a church.
God give grace and patience to my husband.
On the one hand, those dreamy notions come as a reaction to the status quo. I’m just not loving what I’m seeing and experiencing. And I’ve heard about places where it’s better. Where people thrive at work and play and service and learning. So I think to myself, “Self, why don’t you just start one like that?”
And I answer myself (as only crazy people do), “because you have no education background, save your BLOG READING, and you have zero desire or the required skill set to pastor a church.”
Oh, yes. THAT.
But yet I really want these things to exist, so it leaves me sitting in a seat of antsy discomfort, like a pair of jeans from your senior year in high school, that though technically you can fit in them, it’s obvious to everyone that perhaps they should seek retirement.
When my husband’s restlessness kicks in, he seeks out houses or businesses to buy (he clearly married into the right family). Once, cousin E explained that when the boys get these itches, the good wife learns the art of when to squelch and when to let dream because he clearly won’t follow through anyway. It seems it’s good to let the dreaming happen, but more wise to stomp on things once the checkbook comes out and if he can make a good case, then maybe a check can be written. (In the case of B & E, she’s quite obviously been very wise in her stomping and allowing discernment).
I would hope that JJ would employ some of this wisdom, allowing me to keep dreaming until I’m leasing large open spaces. This would be most optimal.
Instead, he sends me links on “how to start a Waldorf school.”
Fortunately, RAB told me they were selling the space I’ve always had my eye on for my endeavors, so I can hold on to hope that I won’t get too out of control. Which is a thankful thing for nearly every person reading, because all of my schemes generally involve the skills and involvement of people I know and really like. As KLR can attest, a brilliant idea generally involves labor on her part.
So here we are, greeting Monday. I wonder what genius the next 5 days will bring.