Category: a hope and a future (Page 5 of 20)

Put your Prime to work for the good of humanity

November 1, 2016 / Michele Minehart

Dear friends,

I have an idea. (I have a lot of those.) But this might be the best one yet. Actually, it’s much too good of an idea to be original to me, but I can’t say that anyone told me about it. This involves online shopping and being a better neighbor. Also, it’s an excuse to upgrade to Amazon Prime.

So, our local shelters need things regularly – toothpaste, deodorant, shampoo, tampons, socks, diapers – and we, the People of Good Intentions often know this and even remember it at the store from time to time, but lack the wherewithal to actually get it where it needs to go. Right? Please tell me I’m not the only one who has lugged around a few cans of beans in the trunk for two months before shamefully adding it to her own pantry.

Here’s what you do:

Call your your nearby resource center, food pantry or woman’s shelter to find out what their top needs are and if UPS can deliver to their site. (It’s always a good idea to ask if you can help.)
Log into Amazon Subscribe ‘n Save.
Choose 1 or 50 items you’d like to regularly offer your friends and neighbors who lack necessary resources. Check the center’s website for a list of current or ongoing needs. Note: Prime members get an additional percent off and I know how you love to get a good deal.
Decide how often you want them to ship. You can buy in bulk and send just 2-3 times a year or keep it consistent and send monthly.
Create a new monthly subscription for these items and ship them direct. If you’re local, consider Open Door Resource Center at 212 W. Wyandot Ave. Upper Sandusky, OH 43351.

Follow up with your site to make sure your helpfulness is actually meeting a need or if you need to change your contribution in any way. (Maybe they don’t need 83 toothbrushes a month but they’re constantly out of socks. You won’t know unless you ask.)

This idea is totally transferable to Amazon Prime Pantry, where you can order items and ship for a flat fee. (Or, if you choose the no-rush shipping on your other purchases, you get to stockpile free Pantry shipping!) You lucky ducks living in cities with one-hour Prime delivery can even add the benefit of perishables, making meals more nutritious for those who need it most. Locals, consider talking to City Mission about their ongoing needs.

You can take this a step further and if you know a family who needs some help, you can ask what they need most and ship it to them. Diapers, formula, detergent – think of the things you gripe about most to your spouse when it comes to price and then buy those things.

And there you go. You’ve now become thoughtful without having to think. Or, as I prefer to think of it, continuously thoughtful but never forgetting.

(As a side note, when I get the email telling me that my shipment is about to sail, I like to say a little prayer for the recipients, just as I would if I had put it in my grocery cart.)

Celebrating a birthday in the mourning

October 3, 2016 / Michele Minehart

Last year I bought myself flowers, for my birthday. I have historically celebrated a birthday week (or two) and have been known not to do it quietly. My last year in Troy, I planned my own GNO party, and even created my own facebook event – this year I did the same with a text picture of yours truly. I’m that person who will try to use every free marketing gimmick in my inbox. (Related: who’s free for Red Robin this month?!)

This might come across sounding quite brattish, as if I make all the noise in order to get people to celebrate me. But that’s not the case. I am surrounded by loving and friends and family who remember me, without my noise. I don’t have to celebrate my own birthday; I get to.

My special day falls amid a string of October dates that my favorite people on this earth marked with black pens. My husband and his family lost his 16-year-old sister suddenly. My best friend buried her mother after a hateful illness. A dear patron saint of our church died abruptly years before we were ready for her to go. Another young boy in our local school system fell to October’s cruel grasp a few years ago. A former employer will face the dreaded two-year mark of grief for her husband. All within this span of 31 days.

Needless to say, no one in my town likes October anymore. Pumpkin spice can’t wash away the bitter taste of loss. My dear friend Kristy says you can step into the crisp morning and smell death in the air.

And here I am, buying flowers and drinking margaritas and asking everyone to smile for the picture. Rude, right?

Living in the wake of loss with those close to me has provided me new wisdom, such as, people say stupid things from a good heart. “Heaven needed another angel” is at the top of the Don’t Say That list. Folks like me who believe in an afterlife in heaven seek to take comfort in those celestial promises. Of course, they’re “in a better place.” But the distance between there and here hurts. Real bad.

Which can only lead me to one conclusion: life, here, matters. If it mattered little, it would hurt little. The more you love, the more you fill days with joy and curiosity and adventure with other people. And the harder it is to see them end.

So if life, here, matters, then… what? I’m only left with one option: to live it in celebration and in gratitude for another year at living it.

I give my loved ones plenty of space to grieve throughout this horrid month. I really do. I try my hardest to be attentive to the calendar, to give space, to nod in solemn agreement that this sucks. We miss her. Grief knows no expiration date and I’ll never ask others to chipper up for the sake of a party – that’s simply not fair.

What I will do is attempt to honor the lives that left too early by approaching my birthday not with disdain at “getting older” but with appreciation that they keep on coming. I’ve got another year on this globe, so what will I do with it? I’m facing 36, an age that others didn’t get. How can I do it justice?

For me, it’s not skydiving or rocky mountain climbing*, but rather the way in which I sow love into my life. It’s more hugs, more forgiveness, more gratitude. It’s acknowledging another work of art in the sunset from my front porch.

It’s also mandating a friend eat unnecessary amounts of nachos with me. It’s acting surprised when my kids hand me a haphazardly wrapped gift. It’s requesting your parents spend too much money renting a cabin in Hocking Hills for the weekend. It’s drinking one more because “it’s my birthday!”

Not in my honor. But in honor of life. In the honor of the gift of another year, another month, another day. I’ll wear the birthday sombrero for a chance at that. I’ll blow out the candles and hold the hands of people I love, at least one. more. time.

*Thanks Tim McGraw for setting that up for me so poetically.

Just know this

September 30, 2016 / Michele Minehart

Every parent wants goodness for their children, even if we’re all a tad misguided as to what those good things might be. Lately I’ve been trying to focus in on a few key things. If I could make sure my children know these things before they leave my home, I feel like I’ve set them up for a relatively successful life.

Of course, I also hope they know how to do their own laundry, pump their own gas, choose a perfectly ripened avocado, and settle into a rainy day with a good book. And balance a checkbook. And write a thank you note. In terms of skills, I could go on and on.

But what I’ve really be considering is what I want them to know. Here’s what I’ve come up with:

You are loved simply by virtue of being born. It’s not earned by good behavior, skills, knowledge or virtue. You don’t have to work at being loved and no amount of poor behavior changes my love. (Some elements of our relationship will change based on behavior, but my love is not one of them.)
The difference between a want and a need. This may be the key to unlocking true contentment. Things and stuff are not bad, but if you cannot separate what you want from what you need, you will likely be controlled by your stuff and things and a constant sense of yearning that will never be fulfilled.
No one is out to get you. Truly, though you are loved and even sometimes talked about, no one is giving you as much thought as you are giving you. Coaches, parents, bosses and teachers make decisions based upon the good of the whole group, not necessarily with you as the center. That being said, you can expect a certain level of human decency and a fair amount of equal spotlight from the people helping you to grow into a better human. They do see you. They’re simply not ordering everything around you. (Nor should they.)
Also, I did not get up in the middle of the night and move your shoes. Neither did your siblings. Stop shifting the blame of your poor memory and habits onto other people.

These are my starting points. I think there might be more, but I’d love to be influenced.

Category: a hope and a future (Page 5 of 20)

Put your Prime to work for the good of humanity

Celebrating a birthday in the mourning

Just know this

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