Author: Michele Minehart (Page 253 of 311)

After bringing home the class hampster in 2nd grade, I ended up on the couch for a week unable to breathe. Turns out I had a tad of asthma, mostly in conjunction with my allergies. Get the wrong kind of mammal hair floating around me and I was gasping and wheezing like an 80-year-old chain smoker. But in general, it wasn’t something that hampered my daily life.

Except gym class. At that point of elementary life, I hated to run. The most probable reason is because of my lack of zip, but I’m sure general laziness lent a good supporting role. And, let’s be honest: if you’re looking for natural athleticism, you’re looking toward the wrong sister (though you ARE reading the words of the 4th grade Stay Healthy Get Fit award. Yep, I won a basketball. Cling to what is good, my friends!). So in my lack of zeal for laps, I continually reminded my gym teacher that I had asthma and can’t breathe, so I can’t run that far. She was wise and knew with whom to pick an argument, so she let me run 2 rather than 3 laps. I win.

But if you want the honest truth, I had a flaw a bit deeper (I know, you’re gasping with surprise that I have a flaw, but I tell you, it’s true!). I felt I was special. I had a condition that excused me from the troubles that all the other 2nd graders were facing, such as those pesky 3rd laps. I mean, why should I be bothered by such short-of-breath-ness?

What I wish Mrs. McKinley would’ve told me was that tiredness and lack-of-breath just come with running. And sometimes, running is just part of the coursework. Some like it, some do it because they have to, and no one is being held to a speed criteria. You just have to finish. Heck, there aren’t even extra points for good form. I’ve only known one “B” in phys ed (the girl who was co-valedictorian with me) and it didn’t even count toward the GPA (I still feel cheated).

There’s a temptation out there to try to find the get-out-of-havoc-of-life-free card. Something gave us this false sense that in our day-to-day, frustrations shouldn’t exist. Tired? How can I be tired? Well, perhaps from living. Work, family, dishes piling up in the sink – it takes energy from you. It’s a fact of life. No one is waltzing through this world without a stress or two.

So, to those who feel that the last lap just isn’t for them, I say buckle down. Man up. I’m sure you can find a doctor out there to put a name to your condition, but life is still going to cause you to get out of breath. And hear me correctly: I’m not saying “get over it.” Some things in life you don’t “get over”. But push through. Because at the end of the day, you still have to pay the bills, love your kids and do the dishes. It’s part of the coursework.

There are people in the world who choose to keep no more than 5 garments in their closet because they want to show solidarity with those who have less. For example, nuns. Or hippies. They have made a decision that things such as halter tops are not necessities and choose, instead, to optimize their resources for a greater cause.

Never in my life have I made such a decision (thought I’m always impressed by it), however my wardrobe now bears a remarkable resemblence to that of the Sisters of Charity. I have a black skirt, gray skirt and white skirt. I have no less than 3 Gap T’s in black and white. I have 2 dresses that are white and green. And 2 pair of denim shorts, one with a rather large hole in the right thigh (it came with a pseudo-hole for an authentic look, but once the hole busted open to a real hole it’s just says “trashy”).

I wish that I could say that my lack of fashionability was for the “greater good” but really it stems from some of my deeper issues:
1. I just had a baby. Anything remotely cute also gathers around the belly button.
2. I have a deep fear of buyers remorse and therefore I never purchase anything that I might regret. So I buy basically plain t-shirts (which, by the way, are cut trim through the middle, so they’re not even functional for me right now!).
3. I’ve exchanged the “frugal” title in for “a downright tightwad” and never – EVER – purchase unless it’s on sale or I have some sort of discount. I can’t even tell you the last thing I bought at full price. You might be quite impressed, but what this really means is that I only purchase things that NO ONE ELSE WANTED IN THE FIRST PLACE.
4. I only see the unattainable. I have several people in my life who are fabulous dressers. So much so that I never see them in something ugly. I, on the other hand, know that I step out in ugliness, so I figure I can’t be like them. So I rarely try.
5. I’m a “saver” – and not just with my money. If I have something cute to wear, I rarely don it for the grocery store. I keep it back – I might want to wear it to XYZ. However, I never go to XYZ, and when I do, I feel so overdressed that I take off the trendy garment of choice to put on a black skirt with a white Gap T, if they fit.

As evidence that I’ve lost all fashion credibility, I offer this: today is the first time I’ve done my hair since this past weekend (read: Sunday). I know this because I just pulled the straightener out of my bag.
Today is Thursday.
Trendy mom:Fail.

It really sounds like I need an action plan of cuteness. But clothes are expensive! My poor mother has tried not to let me fall into the depths of new-mom frumpy despair, but it seems that in my fashion hiatus that we’ve experienced a bit of inflation and a $30 gift card just doesn’t go that far. But I suppose that’s how the long road is walked: one pair of shoes at a time.

I’ve written no less than 10 blogs in the past week, none of which I felt should be “published” in their current state. Partially because I’m not sure they’re interesting, partially because the words aren’t true shadows of my thoughts, these remain in draft mode. But, as I am on maternity leave, I urn for communication with the greater world. So I’ll just give a few thoughts in snapshot form.

1. I’ve been quite the facebook stalker as of late, I believe as a reflection for my desire to connect with humans who use full sentences and eat with big people utensils. I check status updates in an unhealthy frequency. I think I may subconsciously be trying to live vicariously through those who are going to work, visiting neat places and being social in general.

2. Our A/C decided to quit. Last night. When it was close to 90 degrees. Yay. This put me in an absurdly bad mood – not because I was that hot (though I was) or because Miss M couldn’t sleep because it was that hot (though she couldn’t) but because of the principle: things should work when we need them. We just used the heating function a few weeks ago! How can the whole thermostat unit just up and leave like that? I was nearly irate. And very hot.

3. KLM got married this weekend. The entire weekend was full of glee, sadness and nostalgia for me. Sheer happiness for the new couple; sadness for the gaping hole beside her father; nostalgia because I was in Upper so much and around many people whom I’ve loved knowing but never see anymore. As I looked down the row of folks from JSUMC who were in attendance at the reception, specifically the “kids” (who are mostly either married or engaged at this point – add another point in the “you’re getting old” column), it made me long for the days of yesteryear. We had such good times. They were such good kids. Ah, memories. I think it’s mostly selfish thoughts because I know what fantastic futures lie ahead for each of them and I’m all pouty because I know I won’t be a part of it. With much hope, I’ll at least get to watch from afar.

4. Miss M and I are starting to get in sync. THANK GOODNESS. Partially, I think because I gave up milk for her wellbeing, another part because I started to understand what she needed to sleep well, and another part because I gave up thinking that I knew anything. We’ve had several pleasant days (I know, I just jinxed myself) where her crabbiness has been minimal. And generally the crabbiness comes when there are lots of other people wanting to hold and handle her – she’s a bit sensitive and likes things their certain way. Gee, I have NO IDEA where she gets it. I’m quite grateful, however, that I have seemed to be able to provide what she needs in order to be happy again.

5. There are much deeper reflections to come about Miss M only inheriting my bad traits. Why would God take all the bad of a person and put it into someone else without at least taking along one of those endearing habits (and my long, gangly fingers and toes don’t count)? Surly there is an endearing piece of me that is inheritable?! Perhaps she’ll like to write or bake, but since we’re not at a point of reading aloud or capitalizing on dexterity, we don’t know that yet.  I can hope.

6. We’re about to embark on several trips to the lakes for extended periods of time. I love this, because I love being at the lake, however it does entail a bit of work up front. Today we must fetch groceries for the good eats (because that’s rule #2 of going to the lake. Rule #1 involves not wearing pants with zippers or shoes with strings, unless running), and the process of packing must get started. I guess we can’t expect that all fun goes without a little preparation.

7. I’m running again! Oh, the sweet release. I’m up to 3 miles, though not running it in totality, there must be some walking involved. I have high hopes of a few late summer 5ks. I’d love to do a half marathon in the fall, but I’m just not confident in my time to train. Really I need to set my sights high and do the full marathon. What better time than right before I turn the big 3-0? But I would be training and running in solitary, which is no fun.

8. I am a firm believer in deadlines. When I have unlimited amounts of time to do the laundry, it never gets done. But as long as we have a few clean onsies in the house, the piles abound. Mostly because of #1 on this list. I’m not doing anything functional because I’m trying to be a good facebook friend. I did get 18 loads of laundry done yesterday (ok, perhaps I exaggerate a bit. But there were at least 5!), the dishwasher run, a meal prepared, not to mention 2 appointments promptly kept. I call that success. But if I’m going to have a repeat performance today, I need to get my hiney into gear. So enough talking about my life, and more of getting to the work of it.

Blessings to all.