Year: 2013 (Page 11 of 37)

The largeness of small

I’ve tried so hard to post every [week]day for the past few weeks to get better at making a priority of my writing time. However, an incident with a peanut shard has thrown off my game completely. Every few hours we do drops for H’s eye (where the peanut scratched his cornea), plus we took baby M to the chiro and he’s got some post-adjustment soreness so he slept with me a majority of the night. 

The good news: I waited until 8pm to pour a drink last night. I feel like it might be the biggest victory of the day. Seeing as how we showed up at the doctor and the oldest wasn’t wearing shoes, that probably says something significant about my day. 
Oh, and it rained. Poured. Right during pre-school drop off. 
It seems like such small stuff. But life is full of small stuff. I’d propose that life really is small stuff all wadded up into a crazy, hectic day or week. 
I read the other day that we feel God’s presence on the mountain; it’s there that we get a sense of His faithfulness. 
But we live out our faithfulness to God in the valley. 
So… on to another day. And another 2 trips to doctor’s offices.   

Twisted sister

If you know my sister, you’ve noticed how she’s mostly rejected the norms of our culture. She takes a pretty different stance toward things related to healthcare, education and generally what constitutes living a good life. She now likes to rummage through the forest and brew concoctions. We went for brunch in Yellow Springs one time and I told her how I didn’t have any hemp to wear with her there. (She strongly replied that she doesn’t wear hemp. “Yet,” I responded.)

I told a friend that I liken my relationship to the Church to much the same as my sister. I love Her. My life includes so many elements and experiences because she exists – I never would have found them, otherwise. I cannot imagine what might occur that would bring separation, something so irreparable that we’d terminate the relationship. It’s just too valuable.

But much of what She does – well, we’ll just say I would do it differently. I take much of what she offers and find ways to integrate principles into my life, but few things I swallow whole. Maybe, sometimes, I cringe a little. But She always gives me something to think about.

I might tease a bit and poke a little fun. But, as is the rule with family, if you try to do the same I’ll punch you in the neck. She’s mine to tease and mine to protect. Back off, I love Her.

She informs and directs my way of life in both big and small ways. She encourages me to seek goodness in ways that don’t always blend in. The way She lives boldly in contrast to the patterns of the rest of the world inspires me and pulls me along.

She uses her role in The Family to absorb the world, parse it and teach it to her children. She’s raising them up to understand, question, ponder, appreciate and serve. Even if it’s not 100% perfect, I admire the efforts and respect the role.

For better and for worse, I love Her.

Performance prayers

It was one of those mornings. I started tired and late rather than focused and refreshed. The kids woke up early but immediately showed me how tired they still were. Arguments, refusals, well – I’m sure we all can draw up a mental picture. 

As I pulled my greasy hair into its requisite ponytail I said one of those prayers meant to make me feel like God was on my side. He’d know what to do: just show me, God. Here’s my problem, now what is the course of action to solution. The patience equation. Y=m(x) +b. (I believe that might only be the key to finding slope of a given situation, which may be why it didn’t work). 
(Congrats, Mr. Smith. You are appreciated and remembered once again). 
So in my little prayer I began to wonder how Jesus would deal with such unruly children. Surely He is the perfect example. Except… He didn’t have children. Some might interpret this as the perfect example. The little rugrats seem to be a lot of work. My commitment to things faith-related waned since their birth because I suddenly have less time.

The apostle Paul talks about how it’s good to not get married because you can give your life’s attention to God’s kingdom – that verse was cut up, part and parceled during the unwed early years. No one mentioned that when you don’t marry, you (most often) don’t have kids – the real diverter of energy. JJ hasn’t slowed me one iota, but that crib upstairs sure has. 

So how do we learn perfect, Godly parenting from Jesus when he didn’t give us a perfect, specific example. He told us how to love our neighbors, but what about the 3-year-old who rejects bedtimes? Surely picking up a beat-up stranger from the road might be a bit easier than coaxing Little Miss I’ll Scream Cause I Want To into slumber. 
We want perfect solutions, recipes, equations. Say this, do this. Bribe with this. Where is the key, Jesus? Show me the scripture. 
It’s not there. While we want to learn about parenting from God, asking Him to solve our more pressing issues, perhaps the point is to learn about God from parenting. 
God didn’t hide a treasure box full of the perfect parenting solutions; no roadmap exists. We have  a collection of reminders – not about what we need to do to perform the perfect lifestyle – but the qualities we need to grow in order to live a worthwhile life. He doesn’t use the same solution on each of us, so why would we think about creating one for ourselves or our littles? 
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