Month: January 2015 (Page 2 of 5)

Take a breath

This morning I read a Psalm, a poem penned (etched, more likely) by the Great King David on a morning before heading into battle. He spoke of waking the dawn with music lifted to God and ended by asking God to go with his men into battle for the day. In ancient belief, the only way to win a battle is to have your God win the victory. David was no different – he wanted to live to see the sunset and he was asking God for that privilege.

Today two of my friends will say final goodbyes to a dear friend. Just this week marked one year since another dear friend lost her mother.  People in my circle are mourning – parents, close relatives, good friends. Some of those leaving this world are healthy, others not. Some have enjoyed a life filled with days, others, it seems, got half of what was due. It doesn’t matter the circumstances, the pain of loss is often a cut from the same knife.

To King David, marching off to battle or to myself, sitting in my cozy leather chair in the living room, we are all asking for the next breath. David had an advantage as swords and spears tend to bring our attention to the value of the next breath, but it doesn’t change the currency.

I’m too much of a pacifist to enjoy a war analogy; instead I decide to begin my day much the same way. God, the giver of breath and life, be present in my day and continue to grant my lungs that precious inhale and exhale. May my chest rise and fall repeatedly today, to the joy and benefit of myself and my loved ones. Grant that same breath to those I hold close and may we each feel your presence in it. 

 

The circle of life

This is normal in most homes, right?

This is normal in most homes, right? (Also, I asked my children permission to publish this.)

Sunday mornings in our house equate to an extra cup of coffee for mom, dad cooking bacon and eggs, perhaps a show for the kids while we wake up slowly. Then the shenanigans: showering all the little ones and getting ready for church. So it shouldn’t strike me as odd that they started stripping down to race around the house. (Note for future homebuyers who want/have kids: buy a house with a loop. Ours can run through the living room, office and kitchen and make a full circle. This is paramount for entertainment purposes.)

As they were enjoying some Nudie Races, I hear one of them begin to get upset that she’s not in the front. Well, my dear, I tried to explain. It’s a circle. There’s really no front or back. It depends on your attitude if you’re ahead or behind the others.

Oh, friends. What if we lived like this? What if we believed that we’re all making another loop around the sun, instead of believing we must climb to the top first? What if we realized that “ahead” or “behind” can be a tad more relative than we like to believe?

Perhaps we could just approach life like a Sunday morning, plenty of time to run around, never knowing exactly who is in front or behind. Those of us who like to take it fast can run. Those who get winded easily will walk. We wave and giggle as someone passes by and perhaps see one another as inspiration to keep moving, not someone to catch.

Lines Scribbled on an Envelope While Riding the 104 Broadway Bus

by Madeline L’Engle, first published in Lines Scribbled on an Envelope.

I've never been a huge poetry reader but I have loved some recent works that crept into my life. Now I'm slowly working my way through this book. The Ordering of Love is a compilation of several of Madeline L'Engle's previous poetry works along with a few unpublished poems.

I’ve never been a huge poetry reader but I have loved some recent works that crept into my life. Now I’m slowly working my way through this book. The Ordering of Love is a compilation of several of Madeline L’Engle’s previous poetry works along with a few unpublished poems.

 

There is too much pain

I cannot understand

I cannot pray

 

I cannot pray for all the little ones with bellies bloated by starvation in India;

for all the angry Africans striving to be separate in a world struggling for wholeness;

for all the young Chinese men and women taught that hatred and killing are good and compassion evil;

or even all the frightened people in my own city looking for truth in pot or acid.

 

Here I am

and the ugly man with beery breath beside me reminds me that it is not my prayers that waken your concern, my Lord;

my prayers, my intercessions are not to ask for your love

for all your lost and lonely souls,

but mine, my love, my acceptance of your love.

Your love for the woman sticking her umbrella and her expensive parcels into my ribs and snarling, “Why don’t you watch where you’re going?”

Your love for the long-haired, gum-chewing boy who shoves the old lady aside to grab a seat,

Your love for me, too, too tired to look with love,

too tired to look at Love, at you, in every person on the bus.

Expand my love, Lord, so I can help to bear the pain,

help your love move my love into the tired prostitute with false eyelashes and bunioned feet,

the corrupt policeman with his hand open for graft,

the addict, the derelict, the woman in the mink coat and discontented mouth,

the high school girl with heavy books and frightened eyes.

 

Help me through these scandalous particulars

to understand

your love.

 

Help me to pray.

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