One might think that I lack opinion in the Chik-fil-a debacle of 2012. But, really, when has that ever happened? No, I’ve simply been gathering thoughts at the pace of a turtle, a bit here and there, mostly because I’ve been at the lake so long that I’m unable to move at my usual breakneck speed. But my laking time is what brought about solutions, henceforth where we go.
I think the entire debate of chicken sandwiches and opinions on gay marriage might be water under the bridge if people would just buy more hammocks. Well, not just buy more hammocks. Like any product, you’d have to use it, too.
It’s simple, really. Who can get into a heated debate from a hammock? With your body floating weightlessly from the trees, a light breeze to keep you slightly moving… and when attached at the correct angle, like JJ perfected, your neck never cramps while you read. Delightful, I tell you.
And from a hammock, things like chicken sandwiches and exerting our rights to tell someone else who to marry just seem silly. Silly.
It’s about posturing. I once read that a couple resolved to only argue while nude. While JJ and I didn’t adopt this approach, I like what would seem to bring about. Who can really scream with things jiggling about, parts of you flailing that you typically keep tucked in? And issues like how to scoop coffee into the coffeepot (true story) seem outright obnoxious when you’re naked. I mean, your buns are bare and you’re talking about $14? How exactly do you stand in such an argument? Do you try to cover up? Do you strut like a rooster? Pose like the Thinking Man statue or the Heisman trophy?
A naked posture while arguing helps bring about quicker resolution because you’re faced with how silly it all is. (At what point do you say, “okay, clearly we’re not agreeing. Take off your clothes.”?) Similarly, a hammock-induced stance also helps perspective. A hammock is a natural inducer of peace and tranquility. You do not find hammocks at amusement parks or 4-year-old’s birthday parties. Or Van Halen concerts. Or middle school lock-ins.
So, while I respect the rights of others to have opinions on issues such as “traditional marriage” and I respect the rights of others to disagree with them, and I respect the rights of more groups to rally around someone with an opinion and eat chicken – or refuse to eat chicken – on the same day, I still find it a bit silly. Lay in a hammock and see if any of that makes sense.
It’s hard for panties to be bunched in a hammock. It’s about posture. Relax and live peacefully, seeking to do what’s right with everyone as much as you can.** Have an opinion, but realize that an opinion won’t change anything.
Laying in a hammock, enjoying edifying and purposeful conversation? Seeking to learn what it means to love? That changes things.
It changes me.
It changes my heart. My attitude. My pride. My constant need to be right.
We have to start there. We won’t change anything – people, the world, the power of sin, the definition of sin – if we don’t start with changing our own posture.
The hammock industry will thank me for this someday.
**Yes, that was an awful attempt at paraphrasing a scripture that I’m too lazy to look up right now. But I’m sure it’s Biblical. I’d guess that Paul wrote it.