I can get three children under 3 out the door for the day in under 40 minutes. I can navigate bath and bed time of the same said children, keeping screams to a minimum while diapering and jammie-ing everyone in an order that brings about maximum quiet and sleep for everybody. I can even make a homemade dinner, complete with dessert, amid pushcars racing about and balls being thrown to and fro.
I don’t think it’s patience I’m lacking.
But the Pinteresting thing is, I am. Give me 5 crafty tools and a picture and I’m ready to stab somebody’s artsy little finger. Show me a beautiful picture with fantastic fonts and an inspirational saying and when I break out the Adobe package, I nearly punchisize the screen. And the photography? Don’t get me started on taking good pictures, let alone editing them. “Quick and easy” photoshop actions irritate the crap out of me because they are neither quick nor easy for those of us who haven’t navigated the world of digital design since Quark was hip and cool.
I absolutely love beautiful things. But I do not create beautiful things. (Well, except children, but that’s not all my handiwork and we’re a little bit off topic). Since moving in, we’ve hung 1 picture in our living room because I cannot seem to arrange 3 simple black frames in a way that is pleasing to the eye. Beside our One Photo are 2 hip black boxes in which to put some inanimate object to artsify the wall. Yes, you’re correct. THEY’RE EMPTY.
I attribute most of it to 2 things: I’m thrifty to the point of cheap, so I find it hard to justify the costs involved in either the supplies or the finished product to simply “hang on the walls.” Also, I suffer from an innate fear of doing it awful. Or even just kinda-bad. If it’s not simply fabulous, I don’t want it and I’m not confident in my fabulousness abilities.
I know I need to apply a layer of LBW Attitude to just “try it”. Paint can be repainted. Remove nails, shift shapes and try objects in a different room. But it’s just not the way I work… I need results, perfection, blemish-free living. And I need it in a relatively quick fashion. I just don’t have time for do-overs.
I know. It’s probably the outward sign of an inward fallen nature.
Can somebody please fix me?