One flipping duct. It’s what, the size of a pinhole? Yes, I am referring to a milk duct. I’ll just warn all of you males (especially who may fall into my familial lines), this post will likely involve the word lactating. Just sayin’.

Because I’ve nursed MAM over 6 months now (after a solid 9 months with HTM), I assumed that all feeding fears and issues could be put aside. But one evening away at a ladies retreat where I didn’t want to be all Pumpy McPumperson and 3 days later I couldn’t move off the couch without wincing and perhaps a bit of whining/groaning/threatening to cut off the big toe of every male I know because they’ll never have to endure such torture.

For those of you unfamiliar with mastitis, allow me to clarify. One teeeny-tiny, eesey-weensey milk duct in your left breasticle gets a bit full and never empties out. The milk apparently goes a bit sour (my word, not that of my medical professional), and, like a loaf of sourdough, a bacteria is formed (and grows). But does it remain an isolated incident? Um, no. You end up with a fever that would make you change your clothes 3 times that night, (even while under a down comforter) and body aches that rival the effects of the first practice of football twoadays. All so your child can have a “breast start” in life.

However, the Saints Be that Invented Penicillin have knocked that little bugger of a bug right out of my system. My self-dosing probably had nothing to do with it. (Really, the difference between every 6 hours and every 3? It worked for my sinus infection, so I figured, why not?). I was up and at ’em this morning, even making a mexican lasagna for a friend with a new baby at home (however I refused to let our boobies converse for fear that it could go airborn).

So next time I sneak away for 24 hours or less, I shall set a timer to visit a quiet place and allow Medala to sing to me (does yours sing using the same words every time? Mine definately changes it up. Same tune, different chorus). Because a little bit of diligence goes a long way to preventing diseases. Wow, this could be a safe-sex ad on soooo many levels.

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