The following questions may or may not a response of a flood of tears or a quick punch to the neck.

1. “How much sleep are getting?” she’s a newborn. they don’t sleep more than 3-4 hours at a time. YOU do the math. But guess what?! I KNEW this since I’ve already had one. Thank you anyways for telling me that I look exhausted.

2. “How’s JJ’s job search going?” I’ll answer question with question, Jesus-style. Have you looked for a job in the past 2 years? Yeah. Like that. Thanks anyways for reminding me of the uncertainty of our next year.

3. “When are you going back to work?” This question made the list only because of it’s direct correlation to #2.

4. “How much does she weigh?” I’m not sure if you’re calling my kid fat or skinny. And I’m not sure of its relevance to her cuteness factor, either. I think this was one of those questions that came about when people generally just didn’t know what to ask about babies.

5. “Your other one is only 18 months?” Yes. We like to live on the edge. We’re soooo crazy like that.

**Sorry for the extreme sarcasm. It’s one of those days. Blame the lady at JC Penneys with not enough work to do.