tonight confirmed a piece of my calling. i don’t really miss being a youth director. i love talking with the kids. i love thinking about how to express a thought about God that they might understand. i love hearing about what’s happening in their lives and understanding their perspective. but i don’t miss being a youth director. i miss lots and lots of parts of my job, but tonight confirmed that i am where i *should* be. tonight (as i substitute youth directed) wasn’t bad. i enjoyed myself. but i could say, as i arrived home, that i don’t want to still be doing my old job.

**caveat: this doesn’t mean that i don’t wish on a regular basis i could re-live lots of my youth director moments. if i could go back and experience them again – exactly as the were, this isn’t a regrets thing – i totally would. they are some of my favorite memories in life.

allow me to list them.

Playing pit. anna is a screamer.
reading an email from sue b. at lakeside and being completely confused, only to find out she was giving holly a DOOL update.
imitating what i imagined of a david crowder book which involved peeing like a man.
i got a rash on my eye at ichthus.
the boys “checking” the roof of kristy’s car (i wasn’t even in the car and i love it).
scott & jordan “job shadowing” me.
open gym
clinton dropping a couch on his foot.
taking up the most pews at ash wednesday services.
“luggage” night and the parents’ participation in the props game (who’s line is it anyways style). i believe someone was milked.
the night the boys had to sleep over because we were locked out of a lakeside house.
watching JS raise his hand to indicate he wanted to make a decision to follow jesus.
cleaning the house of a single mom.
scott & jordan insisting on using a drill instead of a hammer to hang a picture in another person’s home (we were helping put together a nursery).
singing happy birthday to KLM at sabbath, david crowder style.
picking lynzi up from swim practice each wednesday.
getting ice cream with alyssa. or kelsey. or abbie. or mary. or holly. or whomever my victim might be.
the jesus-calming-the-storm skit.
nick with a hello kitty backpack.
making cameron do lots of math.
bible study with abbie and mary.
driving over coronado bridge while praising under open skies.
watching joe wash daniel’s feet.
doing late-night yoga with clinton and jevon. whiners.

gosh, those days were great. but i just don’t think that unless i have those moments with those kids, that it could live up to my standards.

thanks, guys, for setting the bar high enough that retirement will stick.

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