When i was pregnant with henry there were a few common phrases that drove me batty:
2. it’s going to change your life so much! it’s going to change everything! (to which my cousins smartly replied, “well i should hope so!”)
1. just you wait.
the reason i hated (and still dislike) “just you wait” is because, well, i WAS waiting. JJ and i didn’t haphazardly fall into parenting – we wanted this. we wanted a baby. and we had a pretty good handle, thanks to a lot of the experience around us, on the toll it would take on our social, emotional and slumbering lives. but we both knew it was well worth it.
and we still do.
lately, through henry’s “rough patch” i can see it’s more true than ever. there are difficult times. but that’s anything worth doing. marriage can be hard, but it’s so worth it to spend your life with someone. service to others can be difficult, like in those people-serving jobs (youth directing, teaching, social services, counseling – anything where you’re carrying the burden of loving people), but the privilage of sharing space and time with people brings so much gratification. parenting takes more of yourself than you sometimes think you have to give, but wow. they give you more joy than what you thought you could ever experience.
Jesus was constantly talking in backward terms – you have to lose your life to find it, you have to die to live, you have to give to receive. and i think being a mommy or a daddy is a way of God inviting you to live that on a daily basis. it’s always a choice to give of yourself – your sleep, your energy, your body (i never knew i could double as a jungle gym until lately). but oh my gosh! to have this little person want to climb you and then plant a big kiss (well, more of an open mouth suck) on your cheek????
so here’s what i have to offer: selfishness is pretty lonely.